WELCOME TO MY BRAIN…

I love watching movies – it’s actually a favorite thing to do on date night for Bryan and I. This past weekend was very busy for both of us and so we decided to go out for some dinner on Sunday night and then rent a movie through cable. We we’re scrolling through the options and I came across PS I love you (the movie with Hilary Swank) and I was trying to get him to watch it so I put up the trailer ( a very handy feature through Cogeco) and the trailer was so beautiful I was crying already! I turned to Bryan begging with my eyes to watch this movie. It looked like exactly the kind of romantic comedy that I would love to snuggle up and watch with him. “We just basically watched the whole movie!” He exclaimed but gave in as he always does when it comes to movie choices.

We settled in and each took our respective corners of the couch and threw out the recliners with our Freddie in between us. As the movie went on the space between us diminished. My husband, my biggest supporter and best friend was closing the gaps between us because on film was a couple just like us. How many times have I had that talk with him about the scary reality of our mortality – afraid of losing him. I have lost a great deal of people in my life and I know that death is eventual but the uncertainty of when has always been a problem for the control freak side of me.

We travel through life trying to live not thinking about when it will all end but in all honesty sometimes a healthy reminder of just how short life can be brings you back to a place of appreciation. I love my family (that includes my side and his) and I feel like in the rush of the summer wedding season I have not gotten enough time to spend with them. I am thankful for thanksgiving next weekend as I will get some time to spend with both sides to catch up and make more memories.

(Please do not read on if you have a weak stomach for overt and mushy displays of love)

To my loving husband, watching that movie last night made us both want to squeeze each other a little harder. Those words that you said to me at the end we’re priceless, I will treasure them forever. Every day we spend together is like a gift and I feel so lucky to have found you early on in life. I only hope that our dream comes true and that God grants us the ability to keep our promise to each other. You are my sun and without you my earth would be a bitterly cold place. Whether I have one day left with you or an eternity I never want to take you for granted. I hope I show you on a day to day basis just how much I love you and I just want you to know that even in our darkest moments I can always feel your love and for that I am truly grateful. I can’t wait until you come home tonight and walk through the door, smile that smile at me and say my name in that way that lets me know you are so excited to see me. Thank you for challenging me, for agreeing or arguing with me, for our intelligent conversations, for carrying all the bags when you help out at weddings, for Freddie (yes I know you helped too Mom;), for the office, for your support, for your unfailing love, for being the best giver of presents, for photography and the joy that it has brought to my life, for our language, for your acceptance, for the simple ease that is our relationship, and most of all for taking my hand and agreeing to never let go for the rest of our lives. I love you more than words can say and am left speechless when trying to describe it. I don’t think I ever properly thanked you on our wedding day and I would feel remiss to let another day go by without publicly declaring just how lucky I am. I hope you wander upon this blog post on whichever day you choose to get caught up and smile at work – wherever you are (Toronto or here) and know that I love you very much.

*End mushiness*

If you want to be moved to tears by a movie and feel an appreciation for your loved ones I definitely suggest this movie.

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